Which Pet?

                                               Which Pet????

There are lots of dogs and cats out there. There are probably a million blogs solely devoted to...CATS AND DOGS! I personally adore every non dog/cat pet (but no newts or salamanders). They are 1, cheaper to maintain, 2, so much cooler and 3, some of these pets will give the same or more love than a cat or dog ever would! (You also don't need to house train most of them). Now I'm not an expert per se, but I have 15 books on pets right next to me as I write this post and 7-9 years of experience to draw on, Including lots of parakeets, 2 leopard geckos, lots of hamsters, 1 mouse, 1 Chameleon, and a zillion fish. Note: If you are actually getting one of these pets, DO YOUR RESEARCH!!!! This post should not be your sole research on it!

NOW...HERE...IS...THE LIST!!!!!!!!

Parakeets

The cost to maintain: $
Affection towards you: 💚💚💚💚💚  5 out of 5! ONLY AFTER TRAINING THEM THOUGH!!
Activity:🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃 5 out of 5! Almost constantly playing and moving.
Cons: Poop a lot, get bored without new toys every few months, failed training = you being bullied when trying to train It or It being afraid of hands for a long time.
Personal notes: They love to sing and whistle.

Elvis, "Just like I did hubba hubba"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Snakes

The cost to maintain: $$ require dead mice for food.
Affection towards you:💚 MAYBE will be your friend after several months.
Activity: 🏃 sleeps most of the day.
Cons: Chance of getting bitten, needs dead mice, POSSIBLY POISONOUS DEPENDING ON SNAKE!!!!
Personal notes:

Julian, " I don't want to be near one of them!"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Rats

The cost to maintain: $ about the same cost as a hamster.
Affection towards you: 💚💚💚💚💚💚 they can grow to ADORE you after a little training.
Activity:🏃🏃🏃🏃 pretty active.
Cons: It's a rat.
Personal notes:

Huckleberry Finn, "Rats! RUN EVERYONE!!! Watch out for the plague! Save the women and children!"

Elvis, "Hack! Hack! I don't feel so good"

Einstein, "Get Elvis to the DOCTER!!! ASAP!"

Abraham Lincoln, "Sorry, you can't."

Everyone else, "WHAT!"

Abe, "Ian hasn't made a doctor for this blog, so we're all going to die of the disease now"

WHOOOSH

"Did someone call the Doctor?"

Abe, "Yes! Go save Elvis!"

Doctor, "Hmm, this looks bad, better go back to the Tardis, travel in time, escape Daleks  and then get back just before your friend dies only to be taken by the weeping angels just before we get there..."

Awkward silence.

KERPLOOSH

"Did someone call Chicago MD?"

Silence

"Okay, where is the producer and we can start the stage props. I think we can put some..."

KABOOM

"Chicago MD!!! We need you to add drama to the storyline back home, by finding out one of your patients is your ex-wife! COME ON!"

WOOOOOP

Ian (the author), "Hey look I magically found the cure!"

Everyone, " YEAH!"
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Frogs

The cost to maintain: $$
Affection towards you: NOTHING
Activity: 🏃-🏃🏃🏃 depends on the type.
Cons: Get sick easy.
Personal notes: A poison Dart frog loses its poisonous skin after at least 6 months(To be safe).

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Turtles

The cost to maintain: $ only need turtle food and sometimes goldfish.
Affection towards you:💚 not a lot, but they get happy when they see you after a while.
Activity:🏃🏃🏃🏃🏃 pretty active little creatures after basking.
Cons: lots of cleaning.
Personal notes: Weekly cleaning required for their terrarium, because they eat, poop and sleep in the water.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Tortoises

The cost to maintain:$$ most of them need fresh fruits and veggies
Affection towards you:💚-💚💚💚💚💚💚 some tortoises want to be left alone, and others want to cuddle to death.
Activity:🏃 sleeps mostly
Cons: Most require lots of room, and require lots of fresh foods.
Personal notes: Russian tortoises are ones that will want to cuddle a lot.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Leopard geckos

The cost to maintain: $ super duper easy to maintain
Affection towards you:💚💚💚💚💚 They like being held
Activity🏃 sleeps all day and is only active at night.
Cons: zip.
personal notes: My leopard  gecko Sandy,

Sandy, "That's me!"

really loves zoomed anole food.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hamsters

The cost to maintain: $ super cheap
Affection towards you: 💚💚💚💚💚💚
Activity🏃🏃 sleeps all day and runs in the wheel all night.
Cons: Zip
Personal notes: Hamsters don't live very long.

Lion, " An appetizer for Dinner"

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Guinea pigs

The cost to maintain:$$ lots of alfalfa hay and guinea pellets
Affection towards you:💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚💚
Activity:🏃🏃🏃🏃
Cons: poops alot.
Personal notes: They do this thing called popcorning where when they see their owner they'll "Popcorn" (bouncing up and down, while squeaking) around the enclosure.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Chameleons

The cost to maintain:$$$ Lots of crickets each month
Affection towards you:💚-💚💚💚💚 not really a holding animal, but they can learn to(I think).
Activity:🏃 Not a lot of walking around, but it is really cool when they catch a cricket with their tongue.
Cons: Expensive to get and care for.
Personal notes: Seriously consider if you have the resources for it or not.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Thats the end. hope you have a great day and come back to my blog soon.

Exploding Kittens

                      Exploding Kittens


Okay, so I haven't posted any reviews in a couple months.......oops. But to fix that I have this review on Exploding Kittens.🐈☢☢☢


Lion, "My cousins are exploding?!"

Sandy, "AAAAHHHHHH IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!!!! THE KITTENS ARE FLYING PROJECTILES!!!!!! RUNNNN!!!!!!!"

Abraham Lincoln, "A Cat divided cannot stand"

Julian The lemur, "Of Course it can't! It Has no body to hold the legs on anymore!"

Harry Potter, "Julians right! Its body is over there, there and way up there!

Huckleberry Finn, "Isn't that part of Garfield over there and up there"

Awkward silence...............

Everyone, "....AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I said, "WAIT! By the power invested through me by the amazing keyboard. I hereby reform Garfield and he magically  comes back to life"

Everyone else, "Oh, that makes perfect sense!"

Garfield, " Hey guys! Give me a quick moment, I need to search for my cousin Louie. Yo Louie, you need this leg back?"

Everyone, "AAAAHHHHH" HONK!!!!!!!

Due to current gruesomeness, this part of the story will stop here.

Back to the review. Exploding Kittens is a really fun card game for 2-5 players and it requires 2 minutes to learn and 15 minutes to play. It is just a really weird game. But not the bad weird but funny type weird. There are goats and kittens and tacocats(Its a palindrome!) Its super easy to learn!
the instructions make that super simple. PLEASE NOTE!!!!!! That the game is mostly clean(Except for a cheetah butt), EXCEPT for the NSFW edition! IT IS VERY INAPPROPRIATE AND CRUDE!!!!


Here are the reports on the game(Note I tweaked the reviewing part of this),


Bray Zarea of the San Fran Decade       ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Stan Key from the Chicago paragraph    ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Michael, Jobe, Dan from 99 news          ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Harry Popper from 9 3/4 tv                   ⭐⭐⭐

Miles Pie from the Denver Quad-bune         ⭐⭐

Thank you, reporters! Thanks for reading this review have a good day!

Holes

                              Holes



Welcome back to Lemur Reviews. We (Like I said yesterday) are reviewing "Holes". First off, This Is a really good book. Second off, they dig a lot of holes. And third, Darth Vader wishes, he had thought of the idea first. Note: only Star Warsian fans will understand this joke. Star Warsian? STAR WARSIAN!!!! Lemur patented!

Seal of the Lemur

Darth Vader, "OH MAN!!!!!! Those rebels needed that! Forget choking them! We'll have them dig for hours to find old lightsabers from when we skewered the younglings as a young adult!"


Ian, "VADER!!!!! This is a family blog!"


Vader, "Tomato, Tomoto."


Silence............

Well.......Uh after that........Uh um, thing...........we'll continue back on track. Stanley Yelnats is the main character. WAIT! Stanley Yelnats is a palindrome! Bing bing bing!!! Score 1 for Ian against literary trickery! Stanley is sent to Camp Green Lake to dig a lot of holes for punishment for stealing shoes. And the rest of the story, I won't tell you.


Garfield, "WWWWWWHHHHHYYYYYYYYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"


Panel of Reporters

Positive😊

Bray Zarea from the San Fran Decade,
"It's good"

Stan Key from the Chicago Paragraph,
"Righty ole' good classic."

Neutral😐

Miles Pie from The Denver Quad-bune,
"Meh"

Michael, Jobe, and Dan from  99 news,
"Not the best."

Negative😡

Harry Popper from 9 3/4 tv,
"Horrible."


Thank you! Panel of Reporters! Have a good rest of your day. Peace out homies!(Note: "Peace out homies" was just for laughs)

Vacation 1 vs. Vacation 2

                 Vacation 1 vs. Vacation 2

(Think documentary about bad things voice. low and gravely) Ding! Ding! In the left corner, we have vacation 1. And in the right corner, we have vacation 2. Who will win!


Hello! And welcome back to Lemur Reviews! Today, we are reviewing the different aspects of vacations. I will try to go through most of the main aspects, but, If I forget something you want to know, comment below and I'll see what I can do.




                                                                 Round 1
                                 
                    Road trip vs. Plane trip vs. Boat trip


I've only gone on road and plane trips. So, I'll logically guess about boat trips
                                                   

                                                  $ The Ka-ching Factor $




Road =  $
Description: Very scenic, You can sightsee on the drive to your destination at in-between places.

Plane = $$
Description: Fast and pretty cheap, for how quick you'll get there.

Boat =$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$
Description; If you want a quality cruise you have to pay the big bucks, that will wreck your budget like the nuclear bomb of money. ( trust me, I looked at carnival cruises while typing this up) BUT, If you love sea life and want a 'hang loose man!" moment, this is the route to go.


Huckleberry Finn, "What about a raft?"

Long silence. Computer keys clicking.


                                                       ❋UPDATE❋

Raft  = ￠￠￠￠
Description: Go hobo style! Riding on the edge! Starvation, thirst, and drowning are included in this family fun adventure! Have fun!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


                                                           Round 2
  
                                                         Hotel vs. Motel


Hotel = $ to $$$$$$$$$
Description: Hotels are very nice, they usually come with a pool and most of them offer a free breakfast in the morning.

Motel = $
Description: Harry will describe it.

Harry Potter, "The "Leaky Cauldron" looks like a 5-star Caribbean resort compared to some motels!"

 WARNING: Some motels and a select few hotels have bed bugs. So, quite literally, "Sleep tight and try not to let the bed bugs bite".


                                                          Round 3

                                               Restaurant vs. Make it  yourself

Restaurant = $ to $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$


Make you own = ￠ to $$$$$

In this category, it's all about how much your willing to spend.



                                                        Round 4

                                          Carry-on vs. Checking your bag


Carry-on: easier and faster to get to the terminal, where friends and family might be waiting.

Checking: Don't have to carry the bag on board and lift it into the bins. You do have to wait a while to claim it at the baggage claim though. If you don't get your bag after a few days, It will go to auction actually. I watched a documentary on it. SO MAKE SURE YOU GRAB THE BAG!!!!!!!!



                                                       Round 5

                    Suitcase vs. Backpack or Duffel bag

Suitcase: Pro: Able to carry more.
Con: Tendency to get heavy and make your arm ache

Backpack: Pro: lightweight
Con: Not too much room to pack stuff.

Duffel bag: Pro: The in betweenie-weenie of the other two.
Con: The in betweenie- weenie of the other two.


                                                      Round 6

                          Rent-a-car vs. taxi/bus

Rent-a-car: Pro: able to get to many more places.
Con: Kind of expensive.

Taxi: Pro: Cheap.
Con: Better not travel around the city a lot.

Bus; Pro: More places to go on a bus route.
Con; Must have a family, If you want to go to non-bus route places.


I travel to San Francisco lot. 2 years on, 1 year off. And I usually travel to my destination via the Bart train. It stands for Bay area rapid transportation.

Darth Vader, "Like Death Star stands for.....um..... Demonic Evil Authority That Hates Stinky, Tiny, Annoying Rebels."

I said, " I never heard that from the Star Wars galaxy."

Darth Vader, "I came up with it just now."

Garfield, "Like Lasagna stands for, Legendary, Amazing, Super, Awesome, Great, skip N, Appetizer!"

I said, "....No."


Back on topic. Bart is quick if you need to get somewhere quickly. But, you need someone at the other end to pick you up at your station.


Ding! Ding! The Winner! Ian!!!!!!  Woo woo woo!!!!!!!!!!!! Have a good day! Reporters really couldn't help on this topic.) I also want to say, that I wasn't able to post for a couple weeks due to   a California vacation ,I went on.

Everything on a Waffle

                    Everything on a Waffle





Hello. today we are reviewing "Everything on a Waffle". This book starts with a girl whose parents were lost at sea and everyone tells her they died, but, she doesn't believe so. She was living with an old lady when her uncle came to the town and took her into his care. Her uncle becomes a developer in the tiny whaling town, they live in. She likes to visit this restaurant called "The Girl on the Red Swing" where everything IS served on a waffle. Then, due to a electricians shortcut to make more money, one of her uncle's buildings lights on fire and burns to the ground.



Darth Vader, "Like when I blew up Alderaan!"

Darth Vader, "That was fun!" 

                          Everyone else, "..............AAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!"

                                                                             

General, "Charge on the empire!"

Soldiers, "CHARGE!!!!!!!!!"

I said, "Then, to everyone's surprise, something happens, but, I can't tell you though. No time for reporters we're at war!"

                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                                      

The Westing Game

                     The Westing Game



Hello again. Today we are reviewing "The Westing game". This book is about a man named Sam Westing who ides. Then, a man sells apartments to MANY different people (though only a few will be mentioned). He puts millions upon millions of dollars (or euros, either one) up for grabs if one of the tenants can find out the answer to the game.



Garfield, "Like the answer to the holy lasagna Temple!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I said, "Sure.......I think."


And it all turns into chaos with two bombs blowing up in restaurants and on injuring a person, but, it's only a scar. one of the women in the story is very neglectful and highly favors one over the other.


Harry Potter, "Like me!"

I said, "Yes....but to a lesser degree."

Eventually, after all the hubbub and hoot and nanny die down, The neglected child finds out the answer and wins big time(her name is Turtle by the way).




    (think baseball announcer)  Now its time for your panel of reporters!



In the positive team, we have Stan key from the Chicago paragraph saying "great mystery!".

Now pitching for the negatives is Miles pie from the Denver quad-bune! saying "Saw it comin' a mile away!"

 Batting second in the Positives lineup is Bray Zarea from  the San Fran decade saying 'Pretty good!"

Playing shortstop for the neutrals is Harry Popper from 9 3/4 tv says "Meh."

Playing outfield is Michael in right, Jobe in left and Dan in middle from 99 news say "Fan' Michael, "tast" Jobe, "Ic" Dan.

                                       PLAY BALL!!!!!!!!!!!!!


Thank you for reading this post. Make sure to subscribe to the email notifications, comment below and have a good rest of your day!

The Greatest Showman

                    The Greatest Showman


Prepare to be amazed.......astounded.......mind-blowing, hysteria-inducing and all around out of control! Beeeeeeeeeeeecause, its one of those rare occasions that only happens in the light of the full moon. When a table arises from the ground, smoke billowing, lightning crashing and on that table is "The Greatest Showman" and it hits me with white lights all around and a hidden chorus singing in exaltation.It........Is.........Time for..........A rare movie review (Think stadium fan cheering after a point is scored)😵😵😵😵😵😵😵😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱


Okay, now that the adrenaline has died down, Its time for the rare movie review. We are reviewing "The Greatest Showman"(Obviously). People ADORE this movie (I being one of them). It is the greatest show of the 21st century. Most likely, the best movie ever.


Darth Vader, "What about my movie?!"

Harry Potter, "Or Mine?!"

Lion, "Don't forget my cousin in the "Lion King"!"

I said, "Yes, you all have movies and they're really good! BUT, they just don't compare to this one."

Darth Vader, "People die in my movie!"ea
Harry, "My special effects are amazing!"

Lion, "Ummmmmmmm................. My cousins were drawn."

Harry, "Stay out of this Lion!"

Darth Vader and Harry, "WE'RE NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNLESS YOU SAY OUR MOVIES ARE THE BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Kaponk! Kaponk!


Sorry, I had to tranquilize them. I should take them to the doctor for high blood pressures (That would be a good review add-on like fiction supreme court was for "ticket to ride"😉). The main actor is Hugh Jackman. The movie is based on P.T Barnum. to tell the story without giving the movie away, this is what I have composed (I only used weirdos, so, it would rhyme). Ahem.



                                               He marries lady
                                               He hires weirdos
                                               He makes euros (Actually dollars. But euros rhymes with weirdos)
                                               He leaves weirdos
                                               He comes home euro-less
                                               He has Family problemos
                                               And no more

I won't say the rest of the movie. I don't want to spoil it. The music and choreography are ASTOUNDING!!!!! Its rated PG and is super family appropriate! There is of course as in most movies these days a bad word in there, but, Its in a little bit of the background.


                                              Panel of Reporters
Positive

Harry Popper from 9 3/4 tv says
"AH......AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!"

Bray Zarea from San Fran Decade says
"Astounding!"

Miles Pie from the Denver Quad-Bune says
"The Greatest Show"  get it?"

Michael, Jobe, Dan from 99 news say
"SPECTACULAR!!!"

Negative

Stan Key form the Chicago paragraph says
"Meh."

And for the second time, we are all very disappointed in Stan. I really thought he learned his lesson after that Harry Potter review. But, apparently not (Sigh). Well, We'll talk to him again about it. Thanks for reading this review! Have a good day!

Roblox

                                                      Roblox            



Today we are reviewing Roblox. This is a gigantic online gaming platform. I know that at least some of you, if not most of you have an account or play it. It has many games on it and more are constantly being made. It includes tycoon games.

Garfield, "Like Mcdonald's tycoon. YUM."

Star Wars games.

Darth Vader, "Woo hoo!"

Animal games.

Sandy and Lion, "Yippee!"

And a host of other games. You design your avatar to look like what you want him to look. There is a thing called Robux, but I don't use it because it costs money to get them. Gameplay is smooth for the most part.


                                            Panel of Players


Drew Breeze "The cool one"
"Pretty cool"

Isaac Mewton "The Nerd"
"Meh"

Zale Earnorgan "The racer"
"Sweet"

Tommy Bradley "The sportsy one"
"Yuck"

Illinois James "The action dude"
"Rock on!"

Julian "The lemur"
"Its okay"




I will be creating this blogs own Roblox account with username Lemur reviews or lemurreviews OR lemurreviews.com, so anything with lemur reviews in it most likely. So look out for me on Roblox and if you see me while you are playing post a comment below. We will be reviewing some Roblox games in the future with the Lemur reviews account.  Have a good day!

Madden 08

                  Madden 08

So, we are reviewing,  Madden 08. It's probably considered really old in the game world being made in 2007.

Darth Vader, "If that's really old then your super old! You were born before that!"

Ian(Authors name is Ian.), "I'm just wiser and more experienced then."

Darth Vader, "HA!  You're not wise or experienced!"

Ian, "Well."

I love this game because it was one of the first madden games I played and believe me, I play a lot of Madden! I have Madden 02 thru 12 then 15 and 17. So expect more madden reviews in the future. This game is perfect for you if you A. love old games B. love madden OR C. You Are a super big football fan, but haven't quite caught up to the new football world and is stuck in 2007-2009 football world. This version of Madden has icons under the players that tell you their strengths. Like for example, Michael Vick is a power arm, so he has a rocket for an Icon, stuff like that.

That's the cover for the game.↗

It has really smooth gameplay for an "Old game".Plus as an added bonus if you are a Colts fan, Peyton Manning is on that team. There are many modes on it,  the top two are, superstar where you live the life of a player and there is franchise mode, (My personal favorite) where you run the team for three decades. I highly recommend this game for you. You can actually see what it was like before the Patriot's dynasty.


                                                To the panel of players

Drew Breeze "The cool one"
"Pretty gnarly man."

Isaac Mewton "The Nerd"
"Pointless."

Julian "The lemur."
"COOL!"

Tommy Bradley  "The sportsy one"
"Best....Game....EVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Illinois James "The action dude"
"SWEET!"

Zale Earnorgan "The racer"
"Meh."

From everybody here, have a nice day!

P.S  Comment on the ATTENTION! post. We could use some ideas. Here are some pictures from the game.

What fast food Restaurant?

            What fast food restaurant?

Hello and welcome to the first miscellaneous review of the lemur. Okay, so last night my family couldn't decide where to eat. Subs? No. Chick-fil-a? No. Pizza? No. So, to make your future restaurant picking, I've made this post to help all the people who don't know where to go. This list might be a bit more tuned to my tastes, then the public.


Burgers     

Mcdonalds

So, this might sound weird, but, Mcdonalds burgers (When I'm in the mood for it) sound really good. We don't have an in and out here where I live, so I can't rate that. Burger King is horrible. It's the same thing over and over and.........................OVER! Red Robin is really good, but it is on the pricey side of the burger world. Which is why I picked Mc'ds.


Chicken     

Chick-Fil-A

Chick-fil-a is AWESOME!!!!! It is my personal favorite restaurant by far! It has great food and an added bonus, The workers hardly ever mess up (And when they do they are very sorry about it), AND they are the most polite fast food workers I have ever seen. chicken nuggets from Mc'ds are okay.



Salad

No Idea.

This group is too diverse to judge, but if I had to guess (Even though I've never been there) Panera Bread? I've heard some good reports on it,.



Tacos                              

Again. No idea.

My best guess would be.........Del Taco?


Buffet

Golden Corral

Golden Corral has a great buffet selection. It is really good. If you live in Northern Colorado you should totally try Pizza Ranch.






BBQ                                
Texas Roadhouse

I LOVE BBQ from here. It is super good!! Their rolls with honey butter are to die for! Rudy's is okay. But, only one is outside of Texas (Ironically that's the one I go to). 


Dessert

 
Dairy Queen

Dairy Queen has delicious Ice cream and Ice cream Cake. Their blizzards are the best. BUT, If you live in San Francisco, go to Ghiradellis !!! It's pricey, But, IT'S TOTALLY WORTH IT!!!!!! I don't like to lie, so I can't review Baskin Robbins because I've never been there.



Breakfast

   
IHOP


IHOP has superb pancakes and eggs and bacon and etc. The Egg and I Is average.

Sub Sandwiches

Jersey Mikes OR Jimmy Johns

These two are both so good I couldn't decide which, so I choose both. Subway is okay and Silvermine is pretty good.





For the Ice Cream Lover

Cold Stone

Cold Stone Ice Cream is the best Ice Cream ever! They have so many flavors and mix-ins. IT IS AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



Chinese

Too diverse.



Seafood

Too diverse.








OTHER

Casa Bonita, Denver Colorado
It is amazing! It is so much different from your traditional
Restaurant! It serves Mexican food. The building was built
without a blueprint. it's most iconic feature is a waterfall insideof the building. Here are some pictures. (They have performances at the waterfall every 15 minutes.






Jb's, Greeley Colorado


Jb's is an authentic drive-in restaurant experience for the whole family. Comfort food from the 80's. Burgers, milkshakes, Ice cream, hot dogs and More! Thank you for reading this review!  The group of friends and reporters could not comment today due to the mental therapy they are going through. Have a good day!

Double Crossing

                  Double Crossing


Hello. We are reviewing  Double Crossing this week. This game is an old one.

Elvis, "But not as old as me!"

I said, "You're dead."

Abraham, "I'm dead too!"

Darth Vader, "Me too t..........."

I said, "We've already been over this!"

Everyone, "Ohhhhhh yeahhhhhh. that's right."

Double Crossing is a train game. Where the goal of the game is to get contracts and get to the grand central station as quick as possible.

Sandy, "The game is for 2-6 bugs.....I mean people!"

Lion, 'You think people are bugs?!"

Sandy, "NO, I just......"

Lion, "People are delicious too! They taste like Zebra."

I said, "YOU'VE EATEN PEOPLE!!!!!"

Lion, "A little garlic, a little butter and people are delicious."

Everyone(Excluding animals) AND panel of reporters, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!😱😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 MAN HUNTER!!!!!!! MOMMY!!!!!!"

Abe, "RUN AWAY!!!!"

Huckleberry Finn, "The walls of Ian's mind cannot contain me!"

Garfield, "Sorry to be a downer, but, yes they can."

Huck, ".........AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Harry Potter, "Wingardium Leviosa!"


BAM!!!

Harry Potter, "Float awayyyyyyyyyy."

Abe, "A house in panic cannot think!"

Elvis, "This is not the time to quote your history! now, RUN!!!"

Huck, "I'll make a raft and float away!"

Julian, "Climb a tree!"

Everyone, "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

Okay, think a city with explosions and A ton of fire. That's what is happening in my mind."

BEEP BEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP BEEP

Think black Tv screen. Now, after mass chaos. I managed to lock the lion in a mental cage and everyone else in a padlocked room. The time it takes to play, honestly, depends on how you play it and what your strategy is. But, my rough estimate is 30 minutes to an hour. The fun level in this game actually really depends on the player. I love this game and so so a lot of my family, but, others may hate it. The strategy level is low in this game because it really depends more on the roll of the dice then actual thinking, but, thinking about what to do still makes it a little bit strategic.

The panel of players:

Drew Breeze "The cool one"
"........................"

Okay, no panel of players because they are all hiding in the padlocked room with post-traumatic stress syndrome. Have a good Day! And hope we don't need to go to therapy!

Lord of the flies

             Lord of the Flies

Hello again. Lord of the flies is definitely one of the darker books i'm going to review on this blog. This book is old, with it being published in 1954.

Darth Vader, "That was before a long, long time ago. Back then it was just awhile ago in a galaxy unknown."

It starts with a plane full of school boys crashing on an island. A lot of boys survived the crash and they all go to the beach and have an assembly. Then, they set up a "community" and have a fire for rescue and some hunters to catch the pigs on the Island. They do good for a while, but eventually tensions rise and things start to heat up.

Garfield, "Are they cooking lasagna in that heat?!"

I said, "Of course.All tropical islands have lasagna trees."

Garfield, "Really???!!!"

I said, "No."

Garfield, "Oh man."

A few of the darker aspects is that the "littleuns'" claim to see a beast. When I read it , it scared me a bit.Secondly,  two of the boys get slaughtered. One mistaken for the beast and slaughtered and the other one gets catapulted by a rock, lands on his back breaking it and literally cracking his head open. It's disgusting.

Garfield, "I think we're going to see that lasagna that Jon made me come back up again."

Abraham, "YUCK!!!!!"

Elvis, "We don't want  to see your hubba hubba!"

Lion, "You talking about vomit, is going to make me see that gazelle I just ate."

Julian, "................BLAHHHHHHH!!!!!!"

Sandy, "GROSS!!!"

Huckleberry Finn, "You got it all over me!!!!"

Elvis, "What did I just say about the hubba hubba?!!"

I said, "Okay. Calm down everyone."

But the darkest part is that all but a few join one tribe. And, then after a little bit, they hunt to kill one of the few boys left on the weak side. But, they accidentally set the island on fire, which saves the kid from being and.

 THEY GET SAVED!!!!!!!😄

The end. I would not recommend this for young people. Maybe, 7th grade at least. Now don't get discouraged from reading it. I'm not saying it's a bad book, i'm just giving you a heads up about it.

                                            To the panel of reporters

Positive

Stan Key from the Chicago paragraph says

"Great book!"(We're still horrified by his answer.)

Neutral

Bray Zarea from the San Fran Decade says

"Too scary! But, really good story."

Negative

Michael, Jobe and Dan from 99 news say

"TOO SCARY!!!"

Harry Popper from 9 3/4 TV says

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!"

Miles Pie from The Denver quad-bune says

"Hide in a corner, don't come out. Hide in a corner, don't come out. Hide in a corner don't..........."

Well. Okay then, that's the panel of reporters signing out and saying "We're going to go seek mental therapy!"😀

Characters: Too many to name. But, the entire book only has boys.

☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢☢

WARNING!!!!!!!!!: The creepy, YUCK, violence and disturbing factors are high in this book, most definitely.

Harry Potter

                Harry Potter


Harry Potter is the best book of all time! Millions of people love the series.

Harry Potter, "And the best part is......IT'S ALL ABOUT ME!!!!!!!"

Elvis, "Showoff!"

Lion, "Stinker!"

Darth Cader, "I have a movie series. So, I'm okay!"

Sandy, "I'm the author's pet! Beat that!"

Abraham Lincoln, "A house divided can not......."

Elvis, "QUITE! Abe!"

Abe, "Well excuse me! Besides we've already been over this! It's all the author's fault."

I said, "IS NOT!!!!"

Huckleberry Finn, "I have a book, too!"

Harry, "Good job!!!"

Garfield, "I have a comic strip, books and a television series after me! So, why are you arguing just about books?!"

I said, "GUYS!!!!!!!"

Everyone, "Yeah! what do you want, your not the boss of us!"

I said, "You're my creation on my review blog! I can completely delete you from it!"

Everyone,"OH YEAH?!!!........... Cupcakes are sparkly.....IAN!!!!!!!!"

I said, "Told ya'."




                HONK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Elevator music with the multicolor tv screen.

Okay. It starts off with Harry living with his child abuse offender aunt, uncle and cousin. Someone should call the police on them!


Police, "Where do they live? We'll arrest them and (For every Harry Potter fan that wanted to do this) a painful slap in the face for each reader that wanted to do that."

I said, "Thank you! They live at 4 Privet Drive. Don't forget to slap extra hard!"

Soooooooooooooo,  He gets a letter to go to Hogwarts. THE BEST SCHOOL EVER!!!!! He then spends a lot of time at school and long story short he beats an evil wizard. He also gets some friends at Hogwarts named Hermione and Ron. But in the end, he has to go back to his abusive relatives.

Police, "They're in jail now and we gave them.......some number in the millions of slaps."

I said, "THANKS!!!"

Harry, "Me, me, It's all about me!!!"

Now let's go to our panel of reporters.

Positive

Harry Popper from 9 3/4 tv says
"BEST BOOK I WILL EVER READ!!!! So, much adventure and mystery."

Bray Zarea from San Fran Decade says
"AMAZING!!!"

Miles Pie from the Denver quad-bune says
"I love it!!!"

Michael, Jobe, and Dan from 99 news say
"ASTOUNDING!!"

Negative

Stan Key from Chicago Paragraph say
"Pointless."

We are all very ashamed of Stan Key now. Thank you for reading this post! Have a nice day!

George Washington's socks

            George Washington's Socks


Welcome back to the lemur! We are reviewing (Based on the title) George Washington's socks. This is a really good historical fiction book. We will have an interview with  George himself at the end and for this brief story, he will be in the group of friends.


So, to begin George Washington's socks it starts with four boys and one girl having an adventure in the backyard.

Darth Vader, "To defeat an evil Sith lord?!!"

I said, "Um.....no!"

Darth Vader, "Oh man!!"

They eventually end up on a rowboat on Levart lake. Which time travels them back to the American Revolution.

Einstein, "You can't time travel!"

I said, "For this book, you can!"

Einstein, "Fine(grumble grumble)."

They land on George Washington's boat while he's crossing the Delaware River.

George, "That boat ride made me sore for weeks!"

Huckleberry Finn, "Well try doing it on a raft. WHILE running from a drunk dad!"

George, "I won a war!!"

Huck, "OH YEAH!!! well..,.....um uh..........yeah okay."

Back to topic. Poem time! Ahem........

                                       They get separated
                                        Matt gets enlisterated( It means enlisted, but I had to make it rhyme. so I made up words)
                                       Matt friend die
                                       Matt meet people
                                       Matt meet Indians
                                       He gets reunited
                                       They go back home

And that's about the rest of the story.

George, "I don't remember any children while crossing that river."

                 Now to the panel of reporters

                 Harry Popper from 9 3/4 tv says
                   "Great historical fiction."
               
                 Stan Key from Chicago Paragraph says
                   "Great story!"
                                  Neutral

                        Bray zarea from San Fran Decade says
                           "Good story, but not too descriptive on characters."

                        Miles Pie from the Denver quad-bune says
                          "Great details, a bit boring though."

                               Negative

                            Michael, Jobe, and Dan from 99 news says
                             "A bit boring to the action reader."

                                    Now for the interview.

I said, "How do yo.........."

George, "I got cramps for weeks after crossing that river."

I said, "Okayyyyyyyy."

George, "You know that famous picture of me crossing  the Delaware?"

I said, "Yeahhhhhh."

George, " I didn't mean for that to be famous. I was just  stretching my legs."

I said, "This isn't going right."

Sooooooooooooo Good bye. Thanks for reading this post Have a good day!


Characters: Matt, hooter, tony, Q and Katie.

WARNING: Violence is medium and the YUCK!!! factor is really high.

P.S There is a  sequel to it, but I'll review that later in the future.


                                                                         


                                         

Fiction Supreme Court

                     Fiction Supreme Court


Order! Order! Sorry, Abe and Elvis took their little argument to the court (P.S you have to read the review on"Ticket to ride" to know what I'm talking about). We're still waiting to see which one gets in trouble.


Judge, "Mister Presley, what is your story on the matter?"

Elvis, "Well your honor, it all started this way. So, I was just reviewing on "Ticket to Ride" when Einstein..."

Einstein, "Don't bring me into this!!"

Judge, "Mr. Einstein, did you have anything to do with the matter?!!"

Everyone (Except Einstein of course), "YES!"

Einstein, "Heh heh...well um...you see um..."

Judge, "Einstein! You are a part of the crime! SO, you're going to say your part of the story on the matter."

Einstein, "I was just telling Elvis, oh man! because it's not a super strategic game and he went all sarcastic. And after me and him argued a bit, Abe said: "A house divided cannot stand". Then Elvis went crazy and he and Abe started arguing."

Judge, "Is this true?"

Abe, "Yes, because I cannot tell a lie."

Elvis, "No."

Judge, "Then what is wrong with the answer?"

Elvis, "It was all the author's fault!"

I said, "WHAT!!!!"

Elvis, "Yeah! Because you write what we say! Like that word...And those periods!"

Judge, " Is this True?"

I said, "Yyeesssss."

Judge, "Then I have no choice but to.............Give you a brand new car!"

I said, "Oh, thank you, your honor!"

Elvis, "Judge! He wrote your words! He made you say, he get's a.............Gold nugget!"

I said, "Thank you, Elvis."

Abe, "This is tyranny! This isn't a democracy! What about the right of free sp........... of Free hamburgers!"

I said, "Yippee! Free hamburgers!"

Darth Vader, 'Your path to the.............Doughnut side is complete. What am I saying!"

Lion, "Author this has gone too far! You give them back their........Dirty underwear!!"

Harry Potter, " I could put a spell on him. So he stops changing the words! Avadra...............Leviosa!"

                                           KAPOW!!!!!!!

I said, "You just killed a hummingbird."

Harry, "You're not supposed to make up new spells! You should especially not mess up Avadra............Patronus or ............ Leviosa Patronus!........Uh-Oh."

I said, "I don't believe it. But you just made a lethal patronus that just killed a hamster and you saved an eagle from its hard-won meal."

Harry, "I'll be qu............LOUD NOW!!!! STOP IT!!!!!"

Judge, "You can all leave now! and never..........Forget to go on that trip to the Bahamas! I just paid for that out of my entire salary! Kids, tell mom not to eat for a week! Okay!"

Everyone (Besides me), "Help!.........give the author a chocolate cake?!!! IIIIIIIIIAAAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNN (The author)!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!.

I said, "Mwah ha ha!"(:<

Have a nice Day. Mwah ha ha. Oh! we're still typing when I laughed manically at the audience?!! Dang, It!!

Ticket to Ride

                         Ticket to Ride



Hello. This is the second board game review from the Lemur. For a change, I' am letting the group of friends do the reviewing with (Hopefully) little interference from me. So, here we go.


Abraham Lincoln, "I' am in charge of this discussion today, because the author liked me above the rest of the group. I' am so great that (AHEM!). Sorry. So, here's Elvis for the first part."


Elvis, "Okay pretty mama. This game is about trying to connect cities by use of trains. You collect points based on the cards route it wants you to take.  This game requires mild intelligence to play. So it isn't another Axis and Allies."

Einstein, " Oh man!"

Elvis, "Thank you for your vote of intelligence Einstein!"

Einstein, "It still requires some intelligence, Elvis!"

Elvis, "Well at least it's not another Axis and Allie's brain killer! I couldn't think for weeks after that game!"

Abraham, "A house divided cannot..."

Elvis, "How many times are you gonna' quote that ?!"

Abraham, "Well. Eexxccuussee me!"

Elvis, "You are excused. But you broke the bill of rights."

Abe, "What?!"

Elvis, "The right of free speech."

Abe, "There is no free speech in this group!"

Elvis, "Tut tut tut. A president, breaking the bill of rights. What is the world coming to?"

Julian, "Okay, while those two argue, I'll do the reviewing. This game is for 2-6 players and we'll go to Garfield for the time."

Garfield, "Too long. It messes up my sleeping schedule."

Huckleberry Finn, "I'll dis' correctly then. It takes from 30 minutes to an hour and a half to play."

Julian, "Thank you, Huck."

Darth Vader, "The fun level is high in this game...It is fun to be mean in this game!"

I said, "The way Abe and Elvis are arguing, there might be a world war III soon!"


                                               Panel of Players

Drew Breeze "The cool one"
"Pretty gnarly man!"

Isaac Mewton "The Nerd"
"It rocks!"

Julian "The Lemur"
"It's okay"

Tommy Bradley "The sportsy one"
"Meh"

Illinois James "The action dude"
"Yuck!"

Zale Earnorgan "The racer"
"It's fine"

         Thank you panel of players! Thank you for reading this post! Hope you have a good day. And hope the next post isn't about world war III.(; Goodbye!

Axis and Allies

                      Axis and Allies

 I love Axis and Allies. It is my personal favorite board game. It is based on World War II. There are many different versions of the game for sale. So, I will speak in general to all the board games.






                                                       Specifics

      Players: 2-5 people. Each person is a world power in this game. The powers are Japan, Germany, Russia, USA and the UK. If there are only two people then you are either, the Allies or the Axis.


      Time: HOURS. And I'm talking at least seven.

Abraham Lincoln, "Our nation was formed in less time!"

       Strategy level: Crazy, off the charts, type crazy! Bring an extra brain, when you sit down to play this game.

Elvis, "There's too much hubba-hubba in this game"
\
\
       Fun level: I love it. But for others (Possibly like yourself) it may be dry as toast.

Garfield, "Like every Lasagna is different!"


                                         Panel of players (New to Lemur Reviews)

Drew Breeze "The cool one"
"It's okay"

Isaac Mewton "The Nerd"
" It is.....AWESOME!!! Strategist paradise!"

Julian "The lemur"
"NO MONKEYS!!!!????"

Tommy Bradley "The sportsy one"
"Meh"

Illinois Jones "The action dude"
"It's okay"

Zale Earnorgan "The racer"
"It takes too long! My brain is dead, before the end of the game!"

    Thank you panel of players! Please feel free to comment! From everyone at Lemur Reviews, Have a good day! Goodbye!






The guy over here says goodbye too.

Boxcar Children

               The Boxcar Children



Hello again, and welcome back to Lemur Reviews! We are reviewing the "Boxcar Children", this is the first book in the 149 book series, with more still being created! The book starts with four children looking in the window of a bakery.

Garfield, "Are they going to buy cake?!"

I said, "No."

Garfield, "Oh man!"

They ask the Baker's wife (She hates children) if they can stay the night. She lets them stay the night, but she and the baker have a plan for the children. So the children run away. four words for the next two chapters.

                                                       They find a boxcar



Then after they find it, they spice it up with all sorts of things. They eat bread and milk for their entire time at the boxcar. Again, lots of chapters in an 11-word poem:


                                                     Henry got a job
                                                     four kids pick cherries
                                                     Violet gets sick


  Harry Potter, "I could put a spell on her to make her better!"

I said, "No thank you! She's with a doctor already."


Lion, " I could eat her!"


I said, "NO!!!"


Sandy, "Diseases are called bugs right?'

I say, "Yesssssssssss."

Sandy, " So I'll eat the bugs!"

I said, "NO!!"


 Abraham Lincoln, "A house divided cannot stand!"


I yelled, "Yeah! listen to the dead guy!"


Elvis, "I'm also dead!"

Einstein, "Me too!"

Darth Vader, " Me too two!"

Harry Potter, "I never existed! So why say he's dead when a lot of us are dead or don't exist!"


Sandy, " I'm the author's pet! I exist!"

Everyone in the group of fictional characters, "OH YYYEEEAAAHHHH!!!!!!!"

I said, "One moment please!"



                   BEEP!!!!!!

Okay. Right now, think multi covered tv screen with elevator music background for a little bit.

Okay! Phew! that was hard! They have a grandpa but they don't like him. That's all I'm going to tell you so I don't ruin the rest of the story for you.

                                         To our panel of reporters!!
    Positive(:
Stan Key from The Chicago Paragraph says
" Great children's story!"

Miles Pie from the Denver Quad-Bune says
"Highly recommend!"

Michael, Jobe, and Dan from 99 news say
"Great" Michael
"Beginner's" Jobe
"Story!" Dan

     Negative):
Harry Popper from 9 and 3/4 tv says
"Too fast paced for me."

Bray Zarea from San Fran Decade says
"Not enough detail! Seriously!"

And now it's time for that special interview with Bull Key from the Los Gangeles minute.

I said, "Do you like "The Boxcar children?"

Bull, "Yes I do mate it's a good ole' classic!"

I said, "Would you recommend it for children?"

Bull," I certainly would mate!"

I said, "How could it have been done better?"

Bull, "A bit more description and this book would have been polished to a perfect shine!"

I said, "Any last words on the "Boxcar Children" Bull?"

Bull, "Why a boxcar? Why not a tanker or an auto rack?"

I said, "Thank you for the interview Bulky."

Bull, " What...did you....call me??!!"

I said, "Nothing!"

Bull, "You called me Bulky! I'm going to kill you!"

I screamed, "AAAAAHHHHHH!!!RUN AWAY!!!!"



Thank you for reading this blog post! We'll be reviewing Axis and Allies next. PHEW! Did you know its really hard to run from a guy, while typing? From the group of friends, Panel of reporters and definitely not Bulky! (I"m gonna get you for that!) Have a good dauuggghh.

Bull....choking......me......

Characters: Henry, Jessie, violet, benny, and others.