Wednesday, December 5, 2018

Which Pet?

                                               Which Pet????

There are lots of dogs and cats out there. There are probably a million blogs solely devoted to...CATS AND DOGS! I personally adore every non dog/cat pet (but no newts or salamanders). They are 1, cheaper to maintain, 2, so much cooler and 3, some of these pets will give the same or more love than a cat or dog ever would! (You also don't need to house train most of them). Now I'm not an expert per se, but I have 15 books on pets right next to me as I write this post and 7-9 years of experience to draw on, Including lots of parakeets, 2 leopard geckos, lots of hamsters, 1 mouse, 1 Chameleon, and a zillion fish. Note: If you are actually getting one of these pets, DO YOUR RESEARCH!!!! This post should not be your sole research on it!

NOW...HERE...IS...THE LIST!!!!!!!!

Parakeets

The cost to maintain: $
Affection towards you: πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’š  5 out of 5! ONLY AFTER TRAINING THEM THOUGH!!
Activity:πŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒ 5 out of 5! Almost constantly playing and moving.
Cons: Poop a lot, get bored without new toys every few months, failed training = you being bullied when trying to train It or It being afraid of hands for a long time.
Personal notes: They love to sing and whistle.

Elvis, "Just like I did hubba hubba"
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Snakes

The cost to maintain: $$ require dead mice for food.
Affection towards you:πŸ’š MAYBE will be your friend after several months.
Activity: πŸƒ sleeps most of the day.
Cons: Chance of getting bitten, needs dead mice, POSSIBLY POISONOUS DEPENDING ON SNAKE!!!!
Personal notes:

Julian, " I don't want to be near one of them!"
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Rats

The cost to maintain: $ about the same cost as a hamster.
Affection towards you: πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’š they can grow to ADORE you after a little training.
Activity:πŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒ pretty active.
Cons: It's a rat.
Personal notes:

Huckleberry Finn, "Rats! RUN EVERYONE!!! Watch out for the plague! Save the women and children!"

Elvis, "Hack! Hack! I don't feel so good"

Einstein, "Get Elvis to the DOCTER!!! ASAP!"

Abraham Lincoln, "Sorry, you can't."

Everyone else, "WHAT!"

Abe, "Ian hasn't made a doctor for this blog, so we're all going to die of the disease now"

WHOOOSH

"Did someone call the Doctor?"

Abe, "Yes! Go save Elvis!"

Doctor, "Hmm, this looks bad, better go back to the Tardis, travel in time, escape Daleks  and then get back just before your friend dies only to be taken by the weeping angels just before we get there..."

Awkward silence.

KERPLOOSH

"Did someone call Chicago MD?"

Silence

"Okay, where is the producer and we can start the stage props. I think we can put some..."

KABOOM

"Chicago MD!!! We need you to add drama to the storyline back home, by finding out one of your patients is your ex-wife! COME ON!"

WOOOOOP

Ian (the author), "Hey look I magically found the cure!"

Everyone, " YEAH!"
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Frogs

The cost to maintain: $$
Affection towards you: NOTHING
Activity: πŸƒ-πŸƒπŸƒπŸƒ depends on the type.
Cons: Get sick easy.
Personal notes: A poison Dart frog loses its poisonous skin after at least 6 months(To be safe).

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Turtles

The cost to maintain: $ only need turtle food and sometimes goldfish.
Affection towards you:πŸ’š not a lot, but they get happy when they see you after a while.
Activity:πŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒ pretty active little creatures after basking.
Cons: lots of cleaning.
Personal notes: Weekly cleaning required for their terrarium, because they eat, poop and sleep in the water.

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Tortoises

The cost to maintain:$$ most of them need fresh fruits and veggies
Affection towards you:πŸ’š-πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’š some tortoises want to be left alone, and others want to cuddle to death.
Activity:πŸƒ sleeps mostly
Cons: Most require lots of room, and require lots of fresh foods.
Personal notes: Russian tortoises are ones that will want to cuddle a lot.
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Leopard geckos

The cost to maintain: $ super duper easy to maintain
Affection towards you:πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’š They like being held
ActivityπŸƒ sleeps all day and is only active at night.
Cons: zip.
personal notes: My leopard  gecko Sandy,

Sandy, "That's me!"

really loves zoomed anole food.
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Hamsters

The cost to maintain: $ super cheap
Affection towards you: πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’š
ActivityπŸƒπŸƒ sleeps all day and runs in the wheel all night.
Cons: Zip
Personal notes: Hamsters don't live very long.

Lion, " An appetizer for Dinner"

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Guinea pigs

The cost to maintain:$$ lots of alfalfa hay and guinea pellets
Affection towards you:πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’š
Activity:πŸƒπŸƒπŸƒπŸƒ
Cons: poops alot.
Personal notes: They do this thing called popcorning where when they see their owner they'll "Popcorn" (bouncing up and down, while squeaking) around the enclosure.

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Chameleons

The cost to maintain:$$$ Lots of crickets each month
Affection towards you:πŸ’š-πŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’šπŸ’š not really a holding animal, but they can learn to(I think).
Activity:πŸƒ Not a lot of walking around, but it is really cool when they catch a cricket with their tongue.
Cons: Expensive to get and care for.
Personal notes: Seriously consider if you have the resources for it or not.
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Thats the end. hope you have a great day and come back to my blog soon.















Tuesday, December 4, 2018

Exploding Kittens



                      Exploding Kittens


Okay, so I haven't posted any reviews in a couple months.......oops. But to fix that I have this review on Exploding Kittens.🐈☢☢☢


Lion, "My cousins are exploding?!"

Sandy, "AAAAHHHHHH IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!!!! THE KITTENS ARE FLYING PROJECTILES!!!!!! RUNNNN!!!!!!!"

Abraham Lincoln, "A Cat divided cannot stand"

Julian The lemur, "Of Course it can't! It Has no body to hold the legs on anymore!"

Harry Potter, "Julians right! Its body is over there, there and way up there!

Huckleberry Finn, "Isn't that part of Garfield over there and up there"

Awkward silence...............

Everyone, "....AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

I said, "WAIT! By the power invested through me by the amazing keyboard. I hereby reform Garfield and he magically  comes back to life"

Everyone else, "Oh, that makes perfect sense!"

Garfield, " Hey guys! Give me a quick moment, I need to search for my cousin Louie. Yo Louie, you need this leg back?"

Everyone, "AAAAHHHHH" HONK!!!!!!!

Due to current gruesomeness, this part of the story will stop here.

Back to the review. Exploding Kittens is a really fun card game for 2-5 players and it requires 2 minutes to learn and 15 minutes to play. It is just a really weird game. But not the bad weird but funny type weird. There are goats and kittens and tacocats(Its a palindrome!) Its super easy to learn!
the instructions make that super simple. PLEASE NOTE!!!!!! That the game is mostly clean(Except for a cheetah butt), EXCEPT for the NSFW edition! IT IS VERY INAPPROPRIATE AND CRUDE!!!!


Here are the reports on the game(Note I tweaked the reviewing part of this),


Bray Zarea of the San Fran Decade       ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Stan Key from the Chicago paragraph    ⭐⭐⭐⭐

Michael, Jobe, Dan from 99 news          ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐

Harry Popper from 9 3/4 tv                   ⭐⭐⭐

Miles Pie from the Denver Quad-bune         ⭐⭐

Thank you, reporters! Thanks for reading this review have a good day!

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